More incredibly strange metal

Here are a few more of these oddball metal releases I've collected over the years...

First, two non-classics from the Metal Enterprises label. See this post and this post for more info on that fiasco...

Kalaschnikov, like the other artists in the ME stable, probably just wanted distribution for their mediocre album ('The Torture Never Stops') but got ripped off like so many others when the label did a fake 'follow up' record with their own in-house musicians/producers. Unlike the other groups (such as Killer Fox, whose original recordings were just unlistenable garbage) Kalaschnikov's sound was at least weird on its own.

The whole album kinda feels like it was written in a day, including the lyrics, which are so over-the-top 'evil' you have to hear them to believe them. It's like somebody told the vocalist to just sing about stuff that was the opposite of the Bible, so you get classics like 'Kill Your Neighbor' and 'Devil's Your Hero.' Despite the crappy production, it's a pretty good time, and you can't really hate songs like 'Rockin' By the Graveyard' and 'Video Monsters.' The lack of musicianship also seems to have resulted in some unusual guitar riffs in a kind of Voivod-ish way.

So, then, enter the ME staff's version of Kalaschnikov, present on their second (and final) album 'Desert Storm.' It sounds like they weren't even trying on this one. Two long tracks of obvious space-filling 'ambient' stuff, a few songs that sound a little too musically competent to be the ME staff...my guess is that they got hold of some Kalaschnikov demos for a second album, and dubbed their own awful vocals over. Then there are a handful that are obviously the same people responsible for the second Killer Fox and Thrash Queen albums. The ridiculous female operatic vocals and the snarly cartoonish male vocals, bad drum machines and totally non-metal guitar tones. Oh yeah, and whistling solos.

Yeah. Fucking whistling solos on what is essentially a thrash metal song ('Czarewitch').

Well...basically, if you're for some reason collecting all the Metal Enterprises releases, these will be of use to you. Otherwise, probably not? Oh well, the first album is enjoyably funny at least.

Kalaschnikov - 'The Torture Never Stops'

Tracklist:

1. Devil's Your Hero
2. The Haunted House
3. Rockin' By the Graveyard
4. Kill Your Neighbor
5. Chosen One
6. Demon's Rebellion (Instrumental)
7. Video Monsters
8. Hell's Runnin' Wild
9. Demon's Rebellion (Vocal)

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Kalaschnikov - 'Desert Storm'

Tracklist:

1. Czarewitch
2. Siberian Werewolf
3. Homage to the Holocaust
4. Headbanger
5. Stinking Shrine
6. Scull Scratcher

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Lastly, here's a release that might not be EXACTLY metal, but it definitely has metal influences (mostly from the doom genre) and it's certainly fucked up. While there are quite a few bands calling themselves Warning, this is the 1982 release by the German synth-doom group. Actually, the vocals here wouldn't sound too out of place on a Metal Enterprises release...they're like...death metal growls? I guess? But put through all sorts of effects to make it sound like aliens. The music is literally a head-on collision between OG doom metal (think Sabbath and Witchfinder General) and euro-disco synth stuff.

It's pretty goofy, but it's also very enjoyable, and occasionally really creepy. One review compares them to Rammstein, and I guess that's not far off, but WAY WAY more 80's than that description lets on. It really does sound like Kraftwerk playing satanic metal before that kind of metal even existed. If you read this blog, you'll like it I'm sure.

Warning - S/T

Tracklist:

1. Why Can the Bodies Fly
2. Magic Castle
3. Wild Roses for the Exit
4. Darkness
5. Out of Tune
6. The Door (Pt. I)
7. The Door (Pt. II)
8. A Message
9. Warning
10. Lost in Time
11. In the Crowd

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Rare proto-punk megapost

While doing my proto-punk, punk and post-punk radio show, I often came across some fairly rare releases (not PHYSICAL, but y'know). Some of these took weeks of searching to dig up. Now, I'm dropping a bunch of 'em on you. This post is for the proto-punk stuff, obviously, which would be from the early 60's to the mid-70's.

Heavy Goods Vehicle - 'Keeper of the Sands'

Loud, super-stoned and super-slowed blues rock, in the tradition of Black Sabbath and Pentagram. Maybe a little bluesier than either of those bands, but just as noisy. This album totally sounds like garbage, probably demo recordings of some kind, but it's pretty great because it sounds like they're breaking the tape deck with their volume. Includes a completely incomprehensible cover of 'Wild Thing' that somehow manages to be sloppier than the original. Maybe more proto-doom-metal than proto-punk, but it's got the spirit.

NOTE: The only proper tracklist for this I could find was COMPLETELY different from what I have, so I'm just listing the tracks alphabetically.

Tracklist:

1. 1976
2. Capitalist Blues
3. Feed Back (1976)
4. Heavy Goods Vehicle
5. Heavy Music
6. I'm a Man
7. July Morning
8. Keeper of the Sands (Intro)
9. Lucifer
10. Race with the Devil
11. Time to Cry
12. Wild Thing

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Pi Corp - 'Lost in the Cosmic Void'

Early artifact from the same Ohio scene that produced Rocket From The Tombs, Vertical Slit, Pere Ubu and the electric eels. It's fairly dissimilar from those releases, being more like early Pink Floyd I guess. But, the experimentation and gleefully noisy interludes definitely get it an inclusion in the proto-punk 'genre.' Plus, I think a few members went on to be in 'real' punk bands, so yeah. It sounds like a live recording, and honestly it isn't too great, but it's historical. My favorite tracks are 'Together,' which kinda sounds like a simplified Black Sabbath jam with weird echoed-out yelling over it, and 'Shiiit,' which is a psych-rock jam filtered through basement recording.

Tracklist:

1. Introid
2. The Dirge
3. Drumola
4. Together
5. Devil Weed
6. Just Another Song
7. LSD 1
8. Space War
9. Shiiit
10. Telarama Boogie
11. Organ Over Easy

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Doug Snyder and Bob Thompson - 'Daily Dance'

This one's pretty amazing. Supposedly, these guys went home after an early Iggy and the Stooges show and started writing these noisy, semi-structured jams. They were also from Ohio, although a more rural part. The 'songs' contain no vocals, just super blown-out heavy guitar and equally distorted, frenzied drumming. It actually has a feel not unlike the band Sleep, but obviously less structured. The two guys also regrouped in the late 90's to cut another LP, but I've never heard it. This one was independently released in '73, in a 500-copy run.

Tracklist:

1. Daily Dance
2. Living with the Crocodiles
3. Time Overlaps Itself
4. Soul and Universe
5. Hit and Run
6. Truth is a Pathless Land
7. Teenage Emergency

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Gudibrallan - 'II'

Swedish bang that DEFINITELY sounds a little closer to the punk era, and this goes way back to '71. Although usually listed as prog-rock, don't think it's gonna be a bunch of flutes and weird time signatures. It's actually more like the early Frank Zappa and Captain Beefheart style of prog-rock, where it's just fucked up sounding. I guess there are elements of Swedish folk music here, but I don't know that stuff well enough to pick it out. There is definitely some wild saxophone and lots of yelling though. Somehow, this is the band's second album, too.

Tracklist:

1. T-Doja
2. Sosse
3. Terjes Klagan
4. Sprutan
5. Sommar Uti Hagen
6. John Boy
7. Berusa Er
8. Hispan
9. Visa Om Jungfrun

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